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4 September, 2004
Technology: A Double-edged Pen

This week marks a very important first for me: the first time I ever missed a deadline for this column. Since I began sending The Gazette six hundred of my precious words every month, back in January 1998, I had not ever missed a column. I was a real treat for my editor.

I was impressed with myself for this record. I hear other writers joking about how their careers have involved this many missed deadlines and that many stressed-out editors chasing them down. Ha ha ha! they chortle, as if writing is inherently a chaotic venture, as if we're secret agents dodging traps and vixens on the other side of the iron curtain or superheroes arriving late at our day jobs because we were busy saving kittens from burning buildings.

I assure you, writing is not glamorous. Writers are a cantankerous lot. They're fussy, irritable, self-important, and reclusive. Well, the good ones are, anyway.

How could a writer not be self-important? He or she spends hours writing down their thoughts so others can read them. (Whether or not I am a good one, I truly have no idea. But I am cantankerous and self-important.)

No, writing is merely sitting alone staring at a sheet or a screen, scratching or tapping. And, for reasons quite unknown to me, it often involves ingesting drugs that are quite damaging, such as coffee and cigarettes. Shaking, coughing, ranting, and visiting the restroom hardly a glamorous livelihood make.

Anyway, this weekend brought the end of my impressive reliable streak. My computer was "in the shop", being repaired, and prior to its departure I sent an e-mail to all of my contacts announcing my upcoming absence from cyberland.

Sure enough, my editor left me a voicemail saying that she hoped I could still submit my column, which, unbeknownst to me, was due right away.

Why didn't I know that? She had undoubtedly sent out the new deadline schedule for the columnists (my editor is infallible, trust me). But I hadn't received it. I blame technology!

Fortunately, one writer had submitted her column early, so my editor was able to fill my spot with that piece. (You see, writing really isn't a bunch of dashing about and partying.)

Technology has enabled me to submit my pieces by e-mail every month for almost seven years, and that's nice. But it sure did just double-fail me and leave us all in a tight spot this week. Of course, I was never obliged to rely on e-mail. I could have been driving to the Gazette office every month to submit a hand-written copy. But how would I know if my column was the right length with a word processor to count my words? And what if my car broke down?

The truth is that people "made do" in the past without all of the luxuries we rely on today. Newspapers were laid out just fine before computers, and writers submitted type-written hard copy.

Speaking of my car breaking down, I'll be darned if it didn't do just that this evening. Right on the evening when I needed to write up a piece for the Gazette, too! So here I am taking time out of my night's rest because technology failed me again.

I guess what I'm saying is that, while we have been blessed by technology with myriad luxuries, conveniences, and medical advancements, we mustn't lose touch with the simpler ways of doing things. And let me tell you, I would have trudged through a blizzard, ink-scrawled copy in hand, to submit this column tonight. Now that's glamorous writing.

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